Progressive America: Or a Quiet Plea for Pushing Birth Control

So a guy down here in the Rio Grande Valley wants to create his own political party. He wants to run for president when (him being 27 at the moment)he turns 35. Ok, that's pretty admirable if not ambitious. He says that you as Americans are stuck with only two visions of America. That you are as the "mainstreamed" population "aren't voting FOR political candidates this year, they're voting against the other guy." Okay....According to the polls, you are speaking to about half of the registered voters. I'm still all fucking ears. He says he has a vision for America, and a plan to get America to that vision. What party is this you say? Spool me up a fucking chair. Why it's the Progressive Americans Party. Whoa Whoa Whoa. Isn't there already a progressive party (several different faction to be exact) in America? Wasn't it created by Theodore Roosevelt? But come on people, the man has a vision. The man has a PLAN!!! How many people come up with plans anymore. Lets hear this visionary out. I will only point out the more "relevant" issues.

As printed in the October Issue of Ouch My Ego, Mr Bobby Garcia's comments will be in italics-

On Education:

"Increased Arts, Music & Foreign language education as tools for cultural understanding."
And where does that put suburban white kids? MTV?

On Labor:

"Challenge corporate America to remove the glass ceiling for women and minorities"
Okay
"Look for opportunities to help Americans & corporations make money abroad, while finding ways for immigrants to make money here in the U.S."
Aren't we already doing that, and aren't immigrants getting jobs?

On Politics:

"Put an end to partisan bickering and legislative logjams so we can move America forward"
I'd like to see a plan to have republicans and democrats holding hands in Congress. Then again I think about the people who actually had a plan and got it to work, like Hitler and Emperor Palpatine.
"Change elections law to encourage 3rd party candidates to run for elected offices"
Coming from a "newly formed" third party.

Hot (the fun stuff)Topics:

"Americans have the right to bear arms. But they do not have the right to use them on each other. Gun crimes would be tougher, including assault rifle ban"
This is what we call catering to both sides from a third party funny enough.

Science and Technology:

"We MUST continue manned & unmanned space exploration and the search for extra-terrestrial life"
No funny remark here. I didn't make that one up.
"We MUST find cures for AIDS and Cancer......."
Like I said.....A man with a vision.

There's a whole fucking sheet of this shit for you America. This is why all Americans should vote. We need Bobby Garcia in office!!! We need a man with a rock-solid plan for our country!!! Mr. Garcia....I salute you. Now go fuck yourself.