Get This Guy A Girlfriend

Yes, it's been a while. I see you're fuming. Please don't walk away. Let me explain. I've been absorbed in something for the whole week so this must be a good excuse. Wait......let me think of an analogy.....ok.....got it. Imagine you have been wondering the desert for a week and desperately looking for water as you are dangerously low. Then suddenly, in the horizon, you make out a sparkling oasis. You make it to this oasis to find out that it not only has the most delicious spring water, but it has a bar complete with a wise cracking bartender, Shiner Bock on tap, and a harem of Playboy playmates to pander to your every want and desire. I forget to mention the magic lamp with a genie. That's there too. Now imagine this ideal setting, with all it's splendor, and someone had to package it into a fucking horribly violent game. This is the state of nirvana I have been trapped in. The game is Resident Evil 4 and it is retardedly good. I can't shut the fuck up about it. I just beat it at about four in the morning so more post to come soon.